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Topic: Lost at sea - what would you do to survive?
ara
Posts: 2521
Location: Sydney, New South Wales

So I was talking with some mates over the Easter break when we were out on the boat fishing and survival lost at sea came up.

One of my mates said he had a friend that worked on a cruise ship and during the run down of the safety procedures and equipment there was a rubber hose. It was explained that if they fall overboard that they should place the tube up their anus to allow salt water in. The colon would then allow water to pass through into the body but not salt, preventing dehydration.

Now to me, this seemed a bit weird but sounded plausible, but I was a bit skeptical since I hadn't heard of this before. A bit of googling turned up a reference to a book where it is discussed but not much else.

Has anyone else heard of this? Or other weird survival techniques that seem too crazy to be true?
system
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Obes
Posts: 7459
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
Sailors just like putting rubber things in their ass.
Scooter
Posts: 1856
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
If I was in a situation where I thought I would be alone in the Sea (bush/desert/Snowy mountain/open space without supplies) I would have an EPIRB on me at all times.

Probably wouldn't shove a rubber tube up my arse, but hey, whatever floats your boat.
infi
Posts: 11992
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
retain pee and poop for creative dishes.
TiT
Posts: 2137
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
wait for pirates to come and help
pyro
Posts: 180
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
http://img245.imageshack.us/img245/7032/toiletsnorkel.jpg

last edited by pyro at 13:10:05 14/Apr/09

last edited by pyro at 13:14:57 14/Apr/09
trog
AGN Admin
Posts: 26533
Location: Brisbane, Queensland

hahah WAT!!

That sounds crazy, I'll page nubbin and see if she can cast some light on it. My understanding though is that the rectum is super-absorbent for all sorts of stuff. Like if you put alcohol up there it basically just goes straight into your bloodstream so quickly that you can die from the shock of it, or something. So I would have thought the same thing would be true for salt, but maybe it doesn't get absorbed or something. If it did, you'd probably die from salt poisoning pretty quickly. That story sounds like an awesome tale to scare landlubbers, but it'd be fascinating if it was true!@#

I'd google it but for some reason I don't want all the weird crap that would no doubt showing up in my browser history on my work PC in case people mistake me for a weirdo.
MrHardware
Posts: 4715
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
shelving?
JakeG
Posts: 569
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
sheelvveeee emm!!
Jim
Posts: 9553
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
Now to me, this seemed a bit weird but sounded plausible
not to mention outright pleasurable
Bats***
Posts: 689
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
One of my mates said he had a friend that worked on a cruise ship and during the run down of the safety procedures and equipment there was a rubber hose. It was explained that if they fall overboard that they should place the tube up their anus to allow salt water in. The colon would then allow water to pass through into the body but not salt, preventing dehydration.
Haha this is hilarious. Another magical "a friend of a friend" tale though. The human body uses the salt gradient to absorb the water. So the body absorbs the salt then the water follows. Thus you'd get dehydrated if you shove a rubber hose up your butt and let the salt water in.
Superform
Posts: 5480
Location: Netherlands
i can guarantee you that now that you have heard of this if you were lost at sea it wouldn’t take too many days before you tried it.. no matter what the facts are

i can also guarantee that if you don’t know if it works or not that means there is hope that it will so you will try it 100% of the time after a few days out in the sun

its the same with people who drink salt water eventually after all reason is gone

the will to live can be incredibly strong and can force reason aside



so yes please we need an answer before the next sea voyage
ravn0s
Posts: 7624
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
attach the hose to your tiny penis and drink your own piss
BillyHardball
Posts: 8927
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
I have the Open Water DVD (based on the story of the couple who disappeared while diving off the north coast of QLD). The special features are pretty neat - there's a heap of suggested precautions to take if you're worried about being stranded at sea... but basically, if you don't get rescued within 2 - 3 days, you'll die either of exposure from the sun, dehydration, or being eaten by sharks, or, a combination.
FaceMan
Posts: 796
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
Yeah i saw Open Water on Foxtel while back.
Horror without monsters or killers.

The ending was strange. It was like there was two endings ?

Without a doubt my greatest fear is the open ocean at night.
Ive never been off shore so far that i couldnt see land.
Im also scared of heights.
My legs go to jelly looking over the edg of a 3 story car park.

Wouldnt keeping your clothes wet with sea water also allow water to pass in through the skin ?
whoop
Posts: 13785
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
1) slash my wrist
2) bleed into the water
3) await the arrival of sharks
4) kill and eat those opportunistic f***s when they came to feast upon me only to find I was still alive and in posession of: a) oars b) an outboard motor c) a flare gun and d) the knife I used to slash my wrist.
Pinky
Posts: 1284
Location: Melbourne, Victoria

I used to be scared of swimming in the ocean but since I started doing triathlon and having since grabbed the odd jellyfish while swimming - not so scared anymore. Plus, swimming at St Kilda is probably more health-hazardous than a shark, hehe.

However, open ocean wouldn't be much fun.

As for pipes up rectums - calling urban myth on this one. Human body has low salt concentration, ocean high salt concentration, therefore according to Monsieur Le Chattlier in order to reach equilibrium salt must travel to human body without question. Can't see any physiological reason why not either.
d[o_0]b
Posts: 3055
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
does no one understand the concept of diffusion and osmosis?
Spook
Posts: 24746
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
being left behind by your boat would truly be the scariest of horror stories;
Tollaz0r!
Posts: 9598
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
There are these snakes in Australia that bite the ends of their tails to form a hoop and they role along to cover great distances in the Desert, they are called Hoop Snakes.

FaceMan
Posts: 799
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
ahh this is the movie i saw.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Open_Water_2 Adrift.
fpot
Posts: 16220
Location: Gold Coast, Queensland
Do we need anymore proof that ara is retarded after having thought that this story was 'plausible'?
trog
AGN Admin
Posts: 26542
Location: Brisbane, Queensland

Do we need anymore proof that ara is retarded after having thought that this story was 'plausible'?
maybe YOU'RE intricately familiar with how the ASS works but the rest of us are NOT

(hahahahahah I almost couldn't type that I was laughing so hard at it)
Jim
Posts: 9556
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
lol 'we'
f*** you're a sad c***
d[o_0]b
Posts: 3057
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
anyone who did year 10 biology knows its f***ing retarded
demon
Posts: 4245
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
when i did year 10, biology was just part of the general science class.


as for the stranded at sea... i'd pull a donald crowhurst & just say that i went.
fpot
Posts: 16221
Location: Gold Coast, Queensland
Well 'I' wouldn't really be appropriate because I knew he was a f***ing idiot ages ago.

One thing that hasn't changed on this forum is the 'qgl elite' backing up eachother at all costs. I used to watch when axis would give braindead members of qgl s*** (people like ara) and then Jim and others who can actually make a witty comment or two would come out of the woodwork to help them. Now it is happening again.
trog
AGN Admin
Posts: 26544
Location: Brisbane, Queensland

hey don't ignore my hilarious comment fpot
infi
Posts: 12003
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
I bet he also likes fishdicks. in his mouth.
Infidel
Posts: 2824
Location: Netherlands
TO THE MYTHBUSTERS! I'm sure those two gaybo's can solve it
erol
Posts: 224
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
There are these snakes in Australia that bite the ends of their tails to form a hoop and they role along to cover great distances in the Desert, they are called Hoop Snakes.


You'd be supprised how many Europeans will believe you when you tell them this..

last edited by erol at 16:53:23 14/Apr/09
HeardY
Gaelic newb
Posts: 16050
Location: Ireland
hahah infi wins this thread!
fpot
Posts: 16222
Location: Gold Coast, Queensland
http://www.chevroletpedia.org/wp-content/uploads/2008/02/seinfeld2.jpg
ara
Posts: 2533
Location: Sydney, New South Wales

One thing that hasn't changed on this forum is the 'qgl elite' backing up eachother at all costs.


i'm qgl elite? nice!
Jim
Posts: 9557
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
well what do you care whether or not anyone else here shares your opinion on another forum user fpot? do you really need to feel validated that badly?

'backing each other up at all costs'
gawd give it a rest
nubbin
Posts: 465
Location: Gold Coast, Queensland
This theory is wrong. There are sodium channels in the rectum which actively absorb sodium, and along with it, chloride, resulting in salt absorption into the body. Water would follow, but no, the salt definitely goes with it. Gonna have to find another reason to put a tube up your bum fellas.
fpot
Posts: 16223
Location: Gold Coast, Queensland
I don't care if anyone shares my opinions I was just again expressing how much of a dumbc*** I think ara is.

And before you or he tells me about how he is pretty smart with telecommunications I'll say I agree with you. But how can someone that smart think that sticking a hose up your arse and pumping sea water in will rehydrate you? It's just so obviously an urban myth and he bought it.
trog
AGN Admin
Posts: 26546
Location: Brisbane, Queensland

Gonna have to find another reason to put a tube up your bum fellas.
knowing ara he won't have to look very hard hahaahweahawhjewajhhjerkaehr kjlh kjla rehae hrejkhrehhaha
sleepy
Posts: 877
Location: Sunshine Coast, Queensland
i know its not the same direction as this thread has taken.

back on topic. my mate was the bloke who went missing off moreton recently.
i used to think about the whole lost at sea bit. i reckon it would be one of the most lonely and frightening things to experience.

it really hit home most recently, the reality of it all.


sorry to be mood killer. carry on.
infi
Posts: 12005
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
yeah that's really bad. drowning would be THE worst way to go.

maybe second to choking on fishd... nah that s***'s played out.
trog
AGN Admin
Posts: 26547
Location: Brisbane, Queensland

i used to think about the whole lost at sea bit. i reckon it would be one of the most lonely and frightening things to experience.
you want to read a truly scary ass story about being lost at sea, check out In Harm's Way, a story of the sinking of the USS Indianapolis (the ship that delivered the a-bomb to be dropped on Japan), sunk by a Japanese submarine. It's a truly f***ing scary story about the 900-odd people that went into the water and the much smaller number that survived. Sharks, people going crazy from drinking sea water and super heroic stuff from a couple of amazingly brave dudes.
tequila
Posts: 1962
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
did they find your mate sleepy?
Jim
Posts: 9558
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
I dunno fpot, I reckon if that was true you'd just say he was a dumb c*** directly - not try and involve other people by saying 'we' and then referring to him in the third person

like the way I addressed you for example
fpot
Posts: 16224
Location: Gold Coast, Queensland
Okay I will rephrase.

ara is a dumbc***
TicMan
Posts: 4474
Location: Melbourne, Victoria
This theory is wrong. There are sodium channels in the rectum which actively absorb sodium, and along with it, chloride, resulting in salt absorption into the body. Water would follow, but no, the salt definitely goes with it. Gonna have to find another reason to put a tube up your bum fellas.
Jim
Posts: 9560
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
who are you addressing when you say that fpot?
Fn
Posts: 5429
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
I walk around home with a hose up my ass to fertilize the garden.
fpot
Posts: 16225
Location: Gold Coast, Queensland
no-one in particular
ara
Posts: 2534
Location: Sydney, New South Wales

But how can someone that smart think that sticking a hose up your arse and pumping sea water in will rehydrate you?


i said it sounded plausible but i was skeptical. i said further that after a bit of googling i found it discussed in a survival book. Hence I did what anyone with a question on the internet does, ask QGL.

Now I know you just look for any reason to try and put s*** on me, so you read it how you wanted to but really dude, get some help. Maybe go over to your parents and ask for a big hug from your mum and dad. You need the love.

You didn't even know who I was a few threads ago so I dunno why you have this angsty hardon for me, you thought I was swiss_cheeseman or something, so maybe he wronged you in someway, but that isn't me.

Im ara, and have been around QGL since the start, the hardware you QGL on was put in place by me, the sueing QGL/AusGamers thing you brought up in another thread was out of left field. that never happened and i don't know where you got that from.

much love.
Reverend
Posts: 1311
Location: Gold Coast, Queensland
maybe second to choking on fishd... nah that s***'s played out
yeah that's really bad. drowning would be THE worst way to go.

AHAHHAHAAH best comment yet "tips me hat to you" i actually did LOL .
infi
Posts: 12007
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
check out In Harm's Way


Is there a movie of it? cbf reading.
Bats***
Posts: 690
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
Swiss_cheeseman is fpots brother.

Btw you are slightly retarded. You could have googled "water absorption" and clicked on the very first link and you would have gotten your answer.
d[o_0]b
Posts: 3058
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
^ offensive name
ara
Posts: 2536
Location: Sydney, New South Wales

that is the forth link, but that isn't what i search for.
sleepy
Posts: 878
Location: Sunshine Coast, Queensland
did they find your mate sleepy?



no mate. his mates body was found a day or two after the boat was.
they searched for jase for days and days.
actually surprised how long they did. which was great to hear.


still awfully sad though.
\
nF
Forum Hero
Posts: 15833
Location: Wynnum, Queensland
if you were out at sea with with a very limited amount of fresh water, what you could do is cut the freshwater with sea water to make it last longer. see salty water isn't actually bad for you until you exceed the isotonic concentration. saline is around 0.9%. you can drink that. in fact that's what energy drinks basically contain (they don't just have salt, but the molarity is probably still 0.9%).

so if you cut sea water (which googling is ~3.5%) 1:3 with fresh water you can last a bit longer on a limited supply.

if anyone dies attempting this, don't blame me.
Ospi
Posts: 150
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
K, taking knife/scissors in case I get lost at see.
MatchFixer
Posts: 713
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
fpot shut the f*** up you deads***. You're always on your high horse trying to justify how people are idiots in attempt to elevate your own e-status.

The only dumb c*** here is a bouncer who thinks he's right all the time for whatever reason, i.e. you, f***ing tossah.
Pinky
Posts: 1290
Location: Melbourne, Victoria

fpot you're a f***ing troll idiot. Not as bad as dannyb0y but still, an idiot none-the-less.

Am I QGL elite now? Where do I get my badge?

http://img14.imageshack.us/img14/2017/yhst1954848787499620457.jpg
d[o_0]b
Posts: 3059
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
all aboard the fwagon
tequila
Posts: 1967
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
s*** mate, sorry to hear about that
fpot
Posts: 16226
Location: Gold Coast, Queensland
Umm I know who you are you've been around from the beginning. aragawn/trent/ara right?

And when did I say anything about suing qgl???
ara
Posts: 2538
Location: Sydney, New South Wales

it wasn't you, i apologise.

it was your trusty sidekick in this thread
fpot
Posts: 16227
Location: Gold Coast, Queensland
Pretty much everything you said in that reply to me was wrong.
spidz
Posts: 10371
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
I'd google it but for some reason I don't want all the weird crap that would no doubt showing up in my browser history on my work PC in case people mistake me for a weirdo.

Probably too late, but I hear you!
StopShootingMe
Posts: 2987
Location: Launceston, Tasmania
QGL angst :)

On topic, I heard about a British couple who were lost at sea (in a liferaft) for a fairly absurd length of time, the wife was a nurse and they used the salt water emema trick. They survived, but they were in a tropical area AFAICR so they may have been getting enough rainwater to keep them going. Liferafts and lifeboats both have the means to collect rainwater in addition to their supply of water, which for a liferaft is 1.5 litres per person of capacity (3 days of water after initial 24 hours fasting), for a lifeboat it's double that (3 litres per person, 6 days worth after initial fasting).

As for rubber hoses being part of a ship's survival at sea gear, I very much doubt it. I've certainly never heard of it being done (I think I would have, I go to sea for a job). As has been said though, I'm sure people would try anything and everything once the water ran out.
Storm
Posts: 245
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
Who the hell is that fpot guy anyway.
blue
Posts: 58
Location: Melbourne, Victoria
anyone read life of pi by Yann Marte?
Pinky
Posts: 1293
Location: Melbourne, Victoria

did they find your mate sleepy?
no mate. his mates body was found a day or two after the boat was.
they searched for jase for days and days.
actually surprised how long they did. which was great to hear.


still awfully sad though.
\

Tough story mate. Hard luck losing a mate. I've known a young bloke here that died in a construction accident. Breaks entire friendship groups apart. Very very hard.
Batf***
Posts: 694
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
that is the forth link, but that isn't what i search for.
You are a retard.
it wasn't you, i apologise.

it was your trusty sidekick in this thread
I am your sidekick fpot. Did you hear that? coolface.

Who was the guy that threatened to sue qgl because someone made fun of him?
blue
Posts: 59
Location: Melbourne, Victoria
really? over slugg man or whatever

I did not know that....really puts things into perspective.

fpot
Posts: 16228
Location: Gold Coast, Queensland
I never threatened to sue QGL...
Obes
Posts: 7464
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
fpot are batf*** and ara your friends ?
fpot
Posts: 16229
Location: Gold Coast, Queensland
Batf*** is greazy right? He is okay.

ara is a wanker.
HeardY
Gaelic newb
Posts: 16051
Location: Ireland
this thread needs dragons
tequila
Posts: 1972
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
http://freddyo.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/03/michael_jackson.jpg
greazy
Posts: 696
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
Sigh another name change. Can I at least get a capital G?
Hogfather
Posts: 2570
Location: Cairns, Queensland
I'd google it but for some reason I don't want all the weird crap that would no doubt showing up in my browser history on my work PC in case people mistake me for a weirdo.

Porn Mode! I actualy use it a bit for that reason. I use my laptop for demos and having weird s*** in search auto-complete can be embarrassing ;)

Surely there's a Firefox add-on for this by now?!
Hyperslide
Posts: 175
Location: Melbourne, Victoria

LOL classic thread... well the first page anyways I stopped reading

I used to be in the Navy (RAN) as a CSO (Combat Systems Operator) and have done the SAS training (Survival at Sea). Now I did this more than 10 years ago but I can promise you that they never said anything about shoving hoses up ur butt.... there are some extreme survival methods for surviving at sea but nothing that involves a hose up the butt.

Hope this clears up things a little :)

Cheers
Hyper
Obes
Posts: 7470
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
But when you cross the equator for the first time there is a rubber something up the butt right ?
Superform
Posts: 5485
Location: Netherlands
Hence I did what anyone with a question on the internet does, ask QGL.



the funny part is QGL actually came up with an answer... sigh
system
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