Fire Authorities in California found a corpse in a burnt out section of forest whilst assessing the damage done by a forest fire. The deceased male was dressed in a full wetsuit, complete with a dive tank, flippers and face mask. A post mortem examination revealed that the person died not from burns but from massive internal injuries.
Dental records provided a positive identification. Investigators then set about determining how a fully clad diver ended up in the middle of a forest fire. It was revealed that, on the day of the fire, the person went for a diving trip off the coast - some 20 kilometers away from the forest.

The firefighters, seeking to control the fire as quickly as possible, called in a fleet of helicopters with very large buckets. The buckets were dropped into the ocean for rapid filling, then flown to the forest fire and emptied. You guessed it. One minute our diver was making like Flipper in the Pacific, the next he was doing a breaststroke in a fire bucket 300m in the air. Apparently, he extinguished exactly 1.78m (5'10") of the fire.

Some days it just doesn't pay to get out of bed.

HHAHAHAHAHA

Poor bastard :(

holy crappa... where was his dive buddy?

thats so gay

wasn't that in magnolia?

f*** i heard that one ages ago

you may as well just make up your own s*** cos then it will actually be new

Gotta love those Urban Legends

no ... it was in magnolia ...

and yes ... it did happen ...

sif

then why don't you try posting something mildly interesting then f***wit

i just get the impression that you r thinking that u r some sort of master comedian cos u can use the copy paste function

yeah I'm f***ing hilarious

no I find something I think is interesting and post it that's what everyone else does.

Or aren't I allowed to your majesty

all i said was that it would be funnier if u made up your own s***

its just MY opinion and I believe it to be true, why did u get so offended?

What would be the point you'd just smack that down too

if it wasnt funny id simply say "not funny"

as if id smack you down, i mean if it was Superform...

keep going Ember...

it's a nice change to reading flamed up bulls***. If they bitched with style and creativity it'd at least have entertainment value...

Koopz are you real or just a bot of random kindness

His ass cheeks aren't gonna get bigger if you kiss em you know.

hunter has tried, he knows from experience :P

there's little doubt the two of you are flaming homostrexuals.

f***pot get f***ed... i'm sick of c***s like you f***in me around... i have been banned unfairly from the ausgamers channel directly as a result of your flaming me and my subsequent attempt at trying to defend myself... then you c*** comeing back in mumbers SPEAKING s***... now i'm f***in sick of it...please stop with your immiture flames of other ppls posts...

Actual Answering Machine Messages Recorded and Verified By The World
Famous International Institute of Answering Machine Messages:

10. My wife and I can't come to the phone right now, but if you'll leave
your name and number, we'll get back to you as soon as we're finished.

9. Hello, you are talking to a machine. I am capable of receiving messages.
My owners do not need siding, windows or a hot tub, and their carpets are
clean. They give to charity at the office and don't need their picture taken.
If you're still with me, leave your name and home phone number and they will
get back to you.

8. This is not an answering machine - this is a telepathic thought-recording
device. After the tone, think about your name, your number, and your reason
for calling.... and I'll think about returning your call.

7. Hi! John's answering machine is broken. This is his refrigerator. Please
speak very slowly, and I'll stick your message to myself with one of these
magnets.

6. Hi. This is John: If you are the phone company, I already sent the money.
If you are my parents, please send money. If you are my bank, you didn't lend
me enough money. If you are my friends, you owe me money. If you are a
female, don't worry, I have LOTS of money.

5. A is for academics, B is for beer. One of those reasons is why we're not
here. So, leave a message.

4. Hello! If you leave a message, I'll call you soon. If you leave a "sexy"
message, I'll call sooner.

3. Hi. Now YOU say something.

2. Hi. I'm probably home, I'm just avoiding someone I don't like. Leave
me a message, and if I don't call back, it's you.

And the Number 1 Actual Answering Machine Message Recorded and
Verified by The World Famous International Institute of Answering Machine
Messages:

1. Hello, you've reached Jim and Sonya. We can't pick up the phone
right now, because we're doing something we really enjoy. Sonya likes doing
it up and down, and I like doing it left to right... real slowly. So leave a
message, and when we're done brushing our teeth, we'll call you back.




shame on joo all for having such dirty minds

:P

i didnt flame anyone on this post you moron (untill now), my comment about hunter you could consider a flame but i added a ':P' to indicate i was joking so i wouldnt offend anyone even though i doubt hunter would get offended over a little joke i would say

how about you just get a f***en clue and f*** off, you were banned due to my flaming? you were banned cos your u r a f***ing clueless imbecile you stupid retard!

heard that ages ago

/me goes to reprogram his answering machine.

shutup flamers
funny posts are welcome, flaming in funny posts is not

oh bitch bitch bitch

keep posting interesting stuff...makes a refreshing change from tons of BS...