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Topic: Murphy's Laws of Combat Ops
Einstein
Posts: 409
Location: Brisbane, Queensland

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- Incoming fire has right of way.

- If the enemy is in range then so are you.

- Don't look conspicuous ----- it draws fire.

- If it's stupid and it works, it ain't stupid.

- When in doubt ----- empty your magazine.

- The easy way is always mined.

- Try to look unimportant----- they may be low on ammo.

- Teamwork is essential ----- it gives them somebody else to shoot at.

- Never draw fire ----- it irritates everyone around you.

- Anything you do can get you shot, including doing nothing.

- Never share a weapon pit with someone braver then you.

- If your attack is going really well it's an ambush.

- No battle plan survives contact with the enemy.

- Your weapon was made by the lowest bidder.

- The only thing more accurate then enemy incoming fire is friendly incoming fire.

- When you have secured the area don't forget to tell the enemy.

- Make it tough enough for the enemy to get in and you wont be able to get out.

- If your short on anything but the enemy ----- your in a combat zone.

- The enemy invariably attacks on two occasions ----- when your ready and when your not.

- A sucking chest wound is natures way of telling you to slow down.

----------------------------------------------------

That's one for the CS boys, haha i thought it was rather funny actually =)
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Pharcyde
Posts: 83
Location: Brisbane, Queensland

HAHAHAHAHHAHA f*** I LOVE THAT... where can i get a copy man? its got a s***load in the opposing force manual... f*** its a crackup.

oh and... FIRST POST!!!
Einstein
Posts: 412
Location: Brisbane, Queensland

as far as i know that is the full copy

it was created by our aussie vets from korea and stuff
Cyph
Posts: 146
Location: Brisbane, Queensland

More, some duplicates (w00t for OpFor manual)

1. You are not a superman
2. If its stupid but works, it isnt stupid
3. dont look conspicuous - it draws fire.
4. when in doubt, empty your magazine.
5. never share a foxhole with anyone braver than you are
6. never forget that your weapon was made by the lowest bidder.
7. if your attack is going really well, its an ambush.
8. no plan survives the first contact intact.
9. all 5 second grenade fuses burn down in 3 seconds.
10. try to look unimportant because the abd guys may be low on ammo.
11. if you are forward of your position, the artillery will fall short.
12. the enemy diversion you are ignoring is the main attack.
13. the important things are always simple.
14. the simple things are always hard
15. the easy way is always mind.
16. if you are short of everything except enemy,you are in combat
17. when you have secured an area, dont forget to tell the enemy
18. incoming fire has right of way.
19. friendly fire isnt.
20. if the enemy is in range- SO ARE YOU!
21. no combat ready unit has ever passed inspection
22. things that must be together to work, usually cant be shipped together.
23. radios will fail as soon as you need fire support desperately.
24. anything you do can get you shot. including doing nothing.
25. tracers work both ways
26. the only thing more accurate than imcoming enemy fire is incoming friendly fire.
27. make it tough for the enemy to get in and you cant get out.
28. if you take more than your fair share of the objectives, you have more than your fair share of the objectives to take.
29. when both sides are convinced they are about to lose, they are both right.
30. professional soldiers are predictable, but the world is full of amatuers.
31. Murphy was a grunt.
Ember
Posts: 46
Location: Brisbane, Queensland

Einstein's was better

not that I'm biased or anything =P
Ember
Posts: 46
Location: Brisbane, Queensland

It's not Murphy's Law but it's still kinda funny...

Military Intelligence

The pentagon recently found it had too many generals and offered early retirement bonus. They promised any general who retired straight away, his full annually benefits PLUS $10,000.00 for every inch measured in a straight line along the retiring general's body between two points he chose.

The first general accepted. He asked the pension man to measure from the top of his head to the tip of his toes. 6 feet. He walked out with a check of 720,000.00.

The second general asked them to measure from the tip of his outstretched hands to his toes. 8 feet. He walked out with a check for $960,000.00

Meantime, the first general had tipped off the third. When he was asked where to measure, he told the pension man, "From the tip of my penis to the tip of my balls." The pension man said that would be fine but he'd better get the Medical Officer to do the measuring.

The Medical Officer attended and asked the general to drop 'em. He did. The Medical Officer placed the tape on the tip of the general's penis and began to work back.

"My God!" he said, "Where are your balls?"

"The general replied," in Vietnam."
Ember
Posts: 47
Location: Brisbane, Queensland

Camo Training

During camouflage training in Louisiana, a private disguised as a tree trunk had made a sudden move that was spotted by a visiting general. "You simpleton!" the officer barked. "Don't you know that by jumping and yelling the way you did, you could have endangered the lives of the entire company?"

"Yes sir," the solder answered apologetically. "But, if I may say so, I did stand still when a flock of pigeons used me for target practice. And I never moved a muscle when a large dog peed on my lower branches. But When two squirrels ran up my pants leg and I heard the one say, "Let's eat one now and save the other until winter' - that did it."

Taipan
Posts: 721
Location: Brisbane, Queensland

You guys should real stop copying stuff that you read.All that stuff is in the HL manual.
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