A Charlotte, North Carolina man, having purchased a case of rare, very expensive cigars, insured them against ... get this ... fire. Within a month, having smoked his entire stockpile of fabulous cigars, and having yet to make a single premium payment on the policy, the man filed a claim against the insurance company. In his claim, the man stated that he had lost the cigars in "a series of small fires." The insurance company refused to pay, citing the obvious reason that the man had consumed the cigars in a normal fashion.

The man sued ... and won! In delivering his ruling, the judge stated that since the man held a policy from the company in which it had warranted that the cigars were insurable, and also guaranteed that it would insure the cigars against fire, without defining what it considered to be "unacceptable fire," it was obligated to compensate the insured for his loss. Rather than endure a lengthy and costly appeal process, the insurance company accepted the judge's ruling and paid the man $15,000 for the rare cigars he lost in "the fires."

After the man cashed his check, however, the insurance company had him arrested ... on 24 counts of arson! With his own insurance claim and testimony from the previous case being used as evidence against him, the man was convicted of intentionally burning the rare cigars and sentenced to 24 consecutive one year terms!

uh, that's a joke right..

the joke's on YOU, gomer - AHA!
that kind of thing happens all the time with cigars

Just the sort of story you'd expect from a guy with the name of Ember.

Isn't Ember female...

Funny little story, the bloke got what was comming to him..

that is SO old....i heard about that something like 3 or 4 years ago....it's in all those "Did you know?" books that are about 30 pages long...

I'm female you f***wit

A STROPPY FEMALE TOO !! :O)

http://dem0n.qgl.org/images/mgifz/drgnsmk16.gif

Must be that time of the month again!!! :P

cool I love dragons

I'm not stoppy jsut in every thread almost people say oh good one stupid male or whatever and everytime i tell them i'm female as well as a few p[eople on here have told them so this time I thought I'd make the point very clear

Yes Ember.

charmelion! ember attack, now!

Don't kid yourself Ember, all females are stroppy..

They also freak-out on little mishaps as well..

Little bundles of stress, females are...

ok moving back to the point of this htread americans are so stupid..........

no they're not - take it to the racist thread

Picking on the Sepo's is a great Aussie
past time> You saying that it is now racist.

OMFG

nah, ameriacans arent stupid

just the politics are
wonder if hating politics is classed as being racist

me wonders

No hating politics is normal.

Politics which are made and implemented by the American people

and another thing, america has one of the worlds largest populations of ppl, if mot the bigest.

think about it, like, 30% of the world live in the states, of course you going to find stupid ppl.

but seeing most of us cant read chinese or anything, we prolly miss the game forum in japan with the post "can australians get any stupider?"

and quite a few asutralians have been in the darwin awards as well, so it doent mean all americans are stupid

im not sure what i just wrote but i hope it makes sense

does the name "American" actually describe a race?

Picking on the Sepo's is a great Aussie
past time. You saying that it is now racist.

And, stupid. If you're going to keep paying out on Americans, stop listening to their music and watching their movies.

So when did trog become mr politically correct

since he was a yank

stop listening to their music and watching their movies.

Ok.
I stopped doing that a long time ago.

so bob, your telling us you dont watch american tv, movies OR music

dont you know thats almost impossible?

I don't watch TV.
I probably listen to a little american techno.
And I don't watch movies very much anymore.

'Cept EoE eh Bob :)
Funny story Ember, even more so if its true.

I do, and I've been to America, and I've met a lot of Americans. As Eds said, there's always a certain amount of stupid people in a population - the bigger the population, the more stupid people. But, there's also more smaert people.

Hhmm..
My brother has been living in San Fran for 3 years now, and he says most yanks has childish sense of homour, they are totally money driven, shallow as a dish and the most racist pricks he's ever come across..

He gets treated like an alien...

we come in peace and love. we mean u no harm :D

heh ...

u gotta stop playing there computer games too ... ;P~

My brother has been living in San Fran for 3 years now, and he says most yanks has childish sense of homour, they are totally money driven, shallow as a dish and the most racist pricks he's ever come across..

I lived in SF for a year when I was a kid, then I've been back at every opportunity and I've never noticed those qualities, except maybe the money one (because I was staying in Silicon Valley for a while and uber money happens there).

Eds * and another thing, america has one of the worlds largest populations of ppl, if mot the bigest.
think about it, like, 30% of the world live in the states, of course you going to find stupid ppl. *

30% i think not
250 million americans
5-6 billion ppl worldwide
u do the maths..

china alone has like 1.25 billion ppl they r the largest

hehehe im glad someone else picked up on that Duke

haha i reckon

eds u fail maths right?

i think someone should rename this thread to-

"Can Ember's jokes be any more derivative and old?"

topic: It's happening all the time
f***ot: probably

Can Americans get any stupider

i'm sure they can try

The outcomes of their class actions proves it

He, he.. Fuc off saVage...

Thats fair enough trog, but have you opened your own business there/rubbed your shoulders with other businessmen in the same market..

As for being there as a kid, everything looks different though kids eyes..

I am not saying you are wrong trog, when i trecked across the US for 6 months i came aross all sorts of peaple, but mainly i had a great time..

Mybe my brother has turned into a "stick in the mud", i haven't seen him for 2 years and peaple do change..

I will be meeting him at London in september so i will find out then..

americans are the bad guys u know, their movies and media portray them as the "good guys", however, out of 800billion smackers the world spends on weapons the us spends f***in over 300billion out of that 800 and the closest country is russia on a mere 50billion. actually here are the facts:

Global military expenditures currently exceed $809 billion.

The top military spenders are:

United States $310.6 Billion
Russia* $55.0
Japan $41.1
United Kingdom $34.6
France $29.5
Germany $24.7
Saudi Arabia $18.4
Italy $16.2
China** $12.6
South Korea $11.6

*1998 funding (most recent year available)
** From FY 99 expenditures (most recent year available). Western analysts believe that China's real defense spending is several times higher than the official figure because a number of significant items are funded elsewhere.

Global Priorities

For approximately 30% of Annual World Military Expenditures ($810 billion), all of the following could be accomplished***:
• Eliminate Starvation and Malnutrition ($19 billion)
• Provide Shelter ($21 billion)
• Remove Landmines ($4 billion)
• Build Democracy ($3 billion)
• Eliminate Nuclear Weapons ($7 billion)
• Refugee Relief ($5 billion)
• Eliminate Illiteracy ($5 billion)
• Provide Clean, Safe Water ($10 billion)
• Provide Health Care and AIDS Control ($21 billion)
• Stop Deforestation ($7 billion)
• Prevent Global Warming ($8 billion)
• Stabilize Population ($10.5 billion)
• Prevent Acid Rain ($8 billion)
• Provide Clean, Safe Energy: Energy Efficiency ($33 billion), Renewable Energy ($17 billion)
• Stop Ozone Depletion ($5 billion)
• Prevent Soil Erosion ($24 billion)
• Retire Developing Nations Debt ($30 billion)

Well, you should probably double the figures for that last list, but still...

no they cannot..