A blonde women was speeding down the road in her little red sports car and was pulled over by a woman police officer who was also a blonde.

The blonde cop asked to see the blonde driver's license. She dug through her purse and was getting progressively more agitated.

"What does it look like?" she finally asked.

The policewoman replied, "It's square and it has your picture on it."

The driver finally found a square mirror, looked at it and handed it to the policewoman. "Here it is," she said.

The blonde officer looked at the mirror and then handed it back saying,
"Okay, you can go. I didn't realize you were a cop.".

haha love it

lorf

hahah thats golden

hahahhahha

f***ing gold

two greek gay guys are talking. One says to the other I'm going back to 'greece' the other reply's f*** off you sticking to vaseline

Aha opec.

good one.

probably old but meh:

An Irish Confession

Bless me Father, for I have sinned. I have been with a loose woman."
The priest asks, "Is that you, little Tommy O'Shaughnessy?"
"Yes, Father, it is."
"And, who was the woman you were with?"
"I can't be tellin' you, Father. I don't want to ruin her reputation."

"Well, Tommy, I'm sure to find out sooner or later, so you may as well
tell me now. Was it Brenda O'Malley?"
"I cannot say."
"Was it Patricia Kelly?"
"I'll never tell."
"Was it Lizzy Shannon?"
"I'm sorry, but I can't name her."
"Was it Cathy Morgan?"
"My lips are sealed."

"Was it Fiona McDonald, then?"
"Please, Father, I cannot tell you."
The priest sighs in frustration. "You're a steadfast lad, Tommy
O'Shaughnessy, and I admire that. But you've sinned, and you must atone.
You cannot attend church mass for three months. Be off with you now."

Tommy walks back to his pew. His friend Sean slides over and whispers, "What'd you get?"
"Three month's vacation and five good leads!"


Grandma's dating advice

A young girl was going on a date. Her grandmother said "Sit here and let me tell you about those young boys.

He is going to try and kiss you, you are going to like that, but don't let him do that.

He is going to try and feel your breasts, you are going to like that, but don't let him do that.

But most important, he is going to try and get on top of you to have his way with you. You are going to like that, but don't let him do that. It will disgrace the family."

With that bit of advice, the granddaughter went on her date. The next day she told grandma that her date went just like she had predicted.

"Grandma, I didn't let him disgrace the family. When he tried, I just turned over, got on top of him, and disgraced his family... "

I think an aussie beer commercial used that irish confession joke in it.