|
![]() |
|
| Author |
|
|||||||
|
Dirty Sanchez
Posts: 240
Location: Tasmania
|
INALA IS TO MAKE A BID FOR THE 2008 OLYMPIC GAMES In order to increase the likelihood that the successful bidders will win at least some medals, the competition has been somewhat modified. However, fierce competition is expected from rival areas such as Redcliffe, Logan, Ipswich and Toowoomba OPENING CEREMONY The Olympic flame will be ignited by a petrol bomb thrown by a native of the City wearing traditional flannelette shirt, jeans and moccasins with his defacto wearing the traditional floral leggins and short top with oversized stomach and fat backside THE EVENTS 100 METRE SPRINT Competitors will have to hold a VCR under one arm and a microwave under the other and on the sound of the starting pistol a Police Dog will be released 10 meters behind the athletes. 100 METRE HURDLES As above with the added obstacles, car bonnets, hedges, garden fences and walls. HAMMER THROW Competitors in this event may choose the type of hammer they wish to use (claw, sledge ect.) the winner will be the one who can cause the most grievous bodily harm to members of the public within the timeframe allowed. SHOOTING EVENTS A strong challenge is expected from the men in this event. The first target will be a moving police vehicle, the second targets will consist of running bank Tellers, Video store Attendant and 24-hour service Station Attendants. BOXING Entry to the boxing will be restricted to husband and wife teams and will take place on Friday Night. The husband will be given 15 pots of VB at the local pub followed by a quick peek in a lap-dancing venue. The wife will be told not to make him any dinner when he gets home. She will be wearing bike pants, boob tube and thongs. CYCLING The competitor will attend the nominated City skateboard area where they will obtain a bicycle stolen from BBC or Brisbane Boys Grammar student. They then will be racing against the clock. Bonus points will be awarded should a helmet be obtained at time of theft. MODERN PENTATHLON Amended to include Robbery with Violence, Burglary, Unlawful Use of a Motor Vehicle, Arson and Wilful Exposure. MENS 50km WALK Unfortunately this event will have to be cancelled, as organisers cannot guarantee the safety of anyone walking the streets of Inala. GYMNASTICS The traditional 4-inch beam will be replaced by the strip of gutter outside the Inala Hotel. This event will commence at closing time -we expect some extremely difficult dismounts to be performed on the apparatus. The floor routines will be held directly after this event at the Inala Police Watchhouse. CLOSING CEREMONY Entertainment will include the rock group 'The Inala Beavens Live on stage' group accompanied by other local artists well known within the area. the Olympic flame will be extinguished by the same local identities urinating from the local spire in a cascading effect.The stadium will then be boarded up before local athletes and entertainers break into it and remove all copper piping, light fittings and air conditioners. |
|||||||
| #0 01:44pm 29/08/01 |
|
|||||||
|
system
|
--
|
|||||||
| #0 |
|
|||||||
|
Pharcyde
Posts: 491
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
|
AHHHHHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH OMFG THAT IS FUNNY s***!!! LOVE IT!!!! |
|||||||
| #1 02:08pm 29/08/01 |
|
|||||||
|
Bowen
Posts: 143
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
|
bahahahaahahaha i love it... lets hear it for the sk's that will be going in this olympic's |
|||||||
| #2 02:12pm 29/08/01 |
|
|||||||
|
StopShootingMe
Posts: 644
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
|
Inala, love it :) |
|||||||
| #3 02:15pm 29/08/01 |
|
|||||||
|
YETi
Posts: 446
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
|
those olympics would kick serious ass! esp. the 100m and the 50k walk!!! ahhaha 50k wal's the best |
|||||||
| #4 02:19pm 29/08/01 |
|
|||||||
|
Scythe1o1
Posts: 995
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
|
Sounds very similar to Dandenong's bid for the Olympics ;). |
|||||||
| #5 02:42pm 29/08/01 |
|
|||||||
|
Riker!
Posts: 143
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
|
Thats a classic. /Me Salutes the writer. |
|||||||
| #6 02:42pm 29/08/01 |
|
|||||||
|
Silent Remorse
Posts: 896
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
|
Lol - I've gotten that in my email so many times but it still makes me laugh :) |
|||||||
| #7 02:45pm 29/08/01 |
|
|||||||
|
Bowen
Posts: 146
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
|
i just had to reply agan f*** is funny |
|||||||
| #8 02:45pm 29/08/01 |
|
|||||||
|
Phoenix
Posts: 1054
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
|
EQUESTRIAN Athletes will steal a motorbike from the local Mcdonalds and evade police through a ruged bush track |
|||||||
| #9 03:04pm 29/08/01 |
|
|||||||
|
Silent Remorse
Posts: 897
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
|
SHOT PUT Athletes will be given bowling bowls stolen from Milton Bowl, where they will be judged by distance and damage factor after being lobbed around Gazza's backyard. |
|||||||
| #10 03:27pm 29/08/01 |
|
|||||||
|
fpot
Posts: 2504
Location: Auckland, New Zealand
|
Fencing Contestants will be put in an arena (the local pub) and will duel it out with broken broomsticks. The person left with the most teeth is the winner. In the likely event that the contestants begin the match with no teeth, the winner will be decided on who smells the worst by the end. Pole Vault This event will consist of stealing bamboo out of Robbo's overgrown backyard and trying to vault over the dump's 4m high fence. Winners will not be rewarded in medals. Instead they will be entitled to a 3 hour scavenging session. Weightlifting The winner will be decided on how many cartons of VB they can carry on their shoulders similtaunously. Extra points are awarded to contestants who can drink the beer as well. |
|||||||
| #11 03:34pm 29/08/01 |
|
|||||||
|
PeaceKeeper
Posts: 766
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
|
hahaha |
|||||||
| #12 03:36pm 29/08/01 |
|
|||||||
|
Vorador
Posts: 211
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
|
HOCKEY: Rival gangs are given 8 lead pipes each and are awarded points on each knee cap broken of the opposition team. SYNCHRONIZED SWIMMING: Considering the only pool in Inala is currently littered with dead bodys, this event will be replaced by SYNCHRONIZED SHOPLIFTING, competitors judged on style and least arousal of suspicion. JAVELIN: Rival women of Donny "Bigboy" Zirroni are given a javelin. Rules are simple, last woman standing wins... |
|||||||
| #13 04:00pm 29/08/01 |
|
|||||||
|
b
Posts: 117
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
|
rofl!... werk! :) |
|||||||
| #14 09:43am 30/08/01 |
|
|||||||
|
Toll Booth Willy
Posts: 1018
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
|
that same thing was around this time last year but replace inhala with logan |
|||||||
| #15 10:19am 30/08/01 |
|
|||||||
|
Whisky
Posts: 5
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
|
OMG dirty sanchez, u r a funny chap arnt u, thanks alot m8 i had a right old laugh about that it was hillarious, keep up the top notch work |
|||||||
| #16 04:48pm 30/08/01 |
|
|||||||
|
fpot
Posts: 2512
Location: Auckland, New Zealand
|
He didn't make it up. He stole it off someone. The ones I made up were original :P |
|||||||
| #17 05:54pm 30/08/01 |
|
|||||||
|
JaC
Posts: 142
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
|
llame...check out the original... tingalpa 2008 bid tingalpa 2012 bid the man behind it all he is the original....and he has been in all the papers and on tv.... |
|||||||
| #18 07:01pm 30/08/01 |
|
|||||||
|
system
|
--
|
|||||||
| #18 |
|
|||||||
|
| ||||||||