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Topic: Alexander - The Movie
Psycho!
Posts: 4913
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
Dont waste your money...apart from Angelina it did nothing for me. Oliver Stone lost the plot somewhere in there. I think he almost 'over' directed it in some ways. The actors do a fine job but its mashed together in a haphazard way, I nearly walked out at the end as it wasn't keeping my interest.
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ravn0s
Posts: 2339
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
i dont think its even thread worthy
astrid
Posts: 132
Location: New South Wales
sounds a bit like troy then i still don't get how angelina jolie can play colin farrels mother though unless of course i've missed something
German
Posts: 2333
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
looks s***
nF
Posts: 9009
Location: Wynnum, Queensland
astrid, think gilmore girls.
trog
AGN Admin
Posts: 16086
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
All I've heard about this movie is how incredibly terrible it is.
astrid
Posts: 133
Location: New South Wales
still not believable if its meant to be like that then they shoukd've cast somone who looked younish although i'd prefer they just piss jolie off altogether
Khel
Posts: 9191
Location: Wynnum, Queensland
Its s***, but for reasons entirely different to why I was expecting it to be s***. I'd heard lots of people bagging out colin farrel's acting, but I actually didn't have any problems with the acting at all.

What I did have a problem with was how mind numbingly boring this movie is. It was only about half an hour into the movie when I was already checking my watch and waiting for it to finish. There is very very long chunks of movie where nothing really happens and it all grinds along at a snails pace, then theres one or two big, awesome battles. If there was lots more big awesome battles and lots less boring pointless crap, this could actually have turned out to be a pretty good movie.

Its like Oliver Stone went out of his way sometimes to make sure he didn't show anything interesting. In the movie Alexander jumps from being a kid, to suddenly being king of Greece, Macedonia and Egypt. Do we actually get to see any of the cool battles or scenes where he conquers these places though? No, instead we get a 5 minute voiceover by Anthony Hopkins explaining that he conquered all these places and had many great battles. I dont want some old guy to tell me about all those battles, I want to see them! I mean, its a movie about a dude who conquered all these countries, but we dont actually get to see him conquer most of them. Whats the point!

Also, I think they were a little heavy handed with the gay stuff. Lets put it this way, there was more guys hugging guys and acting flagrantly gay than you'd see in an entire season of Queer Eye for the Straight Guy. And I swear, every second scene Colin Farell was in would end with him looking lustfully after some cute young man. I paid good money to see a movie about Alexander the Great and all the amazing things he did, not about Alexander the Fag and all the men he did.

last edited by Khel at 21:16:10 25/Jan/05
spidz
Posts: 8122
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
hehe nice review khel.
Stez
Posts: 2464
Location: Brisbane, Queensland

haha Khel wins. You lose Stone.
Kat
Posts: 3474
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
The problem with epics is directors try to hard
Reverend Evil
Posts: 10387
Location: Wynnum, Queensland
The movie is absolute rubbish. I stopped watching it after the first battle and even that was terribly ghey. One of the most boring movies to be released in ages.
Khel
Posts: 9194
Location: Wynnum, Queensland
You didn't miss much rev, that first battle is the best part of the movie, its all downhill from there.
Reverend Evil
Posts: 10388
Location: Wynnum, Queensland
Cool. Didn't expect it to get any better.

Also thought Meet The Fockers was complete ass too! Just didn't have the same feel as the original and the setting was all wrong. I think I laughed once thru the whole thing.
Crizane Tribal
Posts: 325
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
Alexander the Great was a fag though, according to high school history. It's like "Gladiator". One of those movies with a bit of action and heaps of dull, political crap that has about as much intrigue as a piece of string. The resulting movie is cheaper and boring. Stupid poeple watching think "hey, this is boring. Must be intelligent stuff! better act like i'm interested and get it!".

It all started with "Braveheart". Ever since then, movie makers have been making movies about William Wallace-esque characters in similar situations. I therefore demand that the names of the following movies are ammended:

Joan of Arc: Braveheart goes to France
Gladiator: Braveheart goes to ancient Germany/Spain/Rome
Star Wars: Episode One: Braveheart goes to Naboo
The Patriot: Braveheart Goes to America
Lord of the Rings: Braveheart goes to Middle Earth
The Last Samurai: Braveheart goes to Japan
We Were Soldiers: Braveheart goes to Vietnam
Troy: Braveheart goes to Troy
Arthur: Braveheart goes to England (again, but on a different side)
Alexander: Braveheart goes to Greece, Egypt, Macedonia, Some guy's ass


I tried to keep them in chronological order. Please feel free to correct the order and add to the list.
spidz
Posts: 8125
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
you forgot Pearl Harbour: Braveheart goes to Hawaii and nails his buddies woman.
Grosby
Posts: 2857
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
Says somethign when the director thinks it's s***
Goody
Posts: 662
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
The Matrix : Braveheart proves there is no spoon and flies.
ravn0s
Posts: 2340
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
braveheart and gladiator rocked
Khel
Posts: 9195
Location: Wynnum, Queensland
Hrmm, interesting read that article. I agree with some of it, like the gay stuff, if there was a sex scene you'd go "Ok, I didn't need to see that", but then you could forget about it. The fact that he is gay and keeps looking lustfully at young boys in nearly EVERY SINGLE SCENE really kills it. Its like, ok, we know hes gay/bi/whatever, get over that and move on with the rest of the movie thanks.

I totally disagree with him saying the fact the movie is doing badly is because of the war in Iraq and people aren't ready to watch a movie about a sensitive, thoughtful hero. Thats just bulls***, this movie would be slow and boring and crap whenever it was released, no matter what was going on the world at the time.
ravn0s
Posts: 2343
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
whats suprising is that i havent seen anything about an uproar by christians about the gay/bi stuff in the film.
Crizane Tribal
Posts: 332
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
Is it just me, or was that article more about making Stone look like a jumpy, paranoid ex-junkie than actually interviewing him?

Also, white text on a dark colour is much easier on the eyes. Thanks QGL!
typo
Posts: 3835
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
Alexander the Great was a fag though, according to high school history.


Sure, but did they need to produce two hours and twenty minutes of men hugging/kissing/humping/jumping into bed with other men?

Alexander the Great did so many other things than just f*** men, and fight a couple of battles. However, if you went to watch this movie you would wonder if Alexander the Great simply should have been Alexander the Great Fag.
Khel
Posts: 9197
Location: Wynnum, Queensland
Obviously he didn't hug or kiss any men in Greece or Egypt, which is why they skipped all those bits in the movie.
Crizane Tribal
Posts: 335
Location: Brisbane, Queensland

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Khel
Posts: 9198
Location: Wynnum, Queensland

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sLaps_Forehead
Posts: 1532
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
In Braveheart and Gladiator the action and the boring bits were perfectly balanced.

BoBa
Posts: 1709
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
all I hear about this movie is seeing colin farrell's nuts
Burgz
Posts: 1298
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
It only pulled something like $20 million in its first MONTH in the u.s, so they pulled it - prolly why i wont go and see it
Khel
Posts: 9200
Location: Wynnum, Queensland
all I hear about this movie is seeing colin farrell's nuts


Yeah, that was entirely un-necessary. The last thing I needed at that point in the movie was an eye full of colin farrell's nutsaq.
Lits
Posts: 199
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
After tomb raider, phone booth and minority report, I have no respect left for angelina jolie or colin farrell.
ravn0s
Posts: 2347
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
colin farrel didnt really have a major role in minority report.
nF
Posts: 9020
Location: Wynnum, Queensland
Obviously he didn't hug or kiss any men in Greece or Egypt, which is why they skipped all those bits in the movie.


Would you hug and kiss a greek man?
Saint
Posts: 1583
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
I thought even the battles were pretty average. Colin Farrel was good, but just didn't seem to fit the role. Not sure why, perhaps it was just the direction .. and I agree on all the other points Khel mentioned. The movie just seemed way too tryhard and overdone.
Opec
Posts: 2696
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
Sounds like I'd be better off investing in a National Geographic DVD about Alexander the great.

Personally I'd never had high expectation of this movie even since I heard it's being made, this just confirms it.
AnaRoT
Posts: 8157
Location: Queensland

Minority report was great! And who gives a f*** about whether Angelina can act - none of the other chicks in Hollywood except Cate Blanchett can act, and at least Angelina looks glamorous. At last years Oscars, she was the only one that didn't make me want to spew ffs.
Rukh
Posts: 578
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
Phone Booth was a great movie. Loved it.

Alexander the Great....bit of a yawn fest to be honest. I also started checking my watch every now and then.

As for WoW...why would you ever want to play on a PvE server? You miss out on so much fun. Maybe it's my fps background showing through but what's the point of playing online if you're not playing against other people?
Khel
Posts: 9208
Location: Wynnum, Queensland
I thought even the battles were pretty average.


Yeah, they were rather average compared to other movies. That first big battle was confusing as, I had no idea of what was going on. I think the only reason I enjoyed the battles was because they were really violent and had some really nasty looking hits :P

The second battle was pretty lame and didn't go anywhere either, the only reason I was still watching the movie at that point was because I saw war elephants in the trailer and wanted to see the war elephants. That red filter they put over the picture though got really REALLY annoying. It stayed on for so long that I was starting to wonder whether something had actually gone wrong with the film.

why would you ever want to play on a PvE server? You miss out on so much fun. Maybe it's my fps background showing through but what's the point of playing online if you're not playing against other people?


Well, originally I just went there cos I knew people already playing there. I had the same opinion of pve, but its not as bad as I thought. Lots of people still do pvp raids, its just you can't get randomly ganked. I guess its more planned pvp than just spontaneous pvp.

At the moment though I decided I dont really care either way, because pvp is pretty pointless till they add honor/rewards to it. And pve servers still get battlegrounds anyway so that covers the other side of pvp fine.

last edited by Khel at 13:41:27 27/Jan/05
fpot
Posts: 10800
Location: Gold Coast, Queensland
The OC: ghey-ifying a good acronym
It's not an acronym :P
typo
Posts: 3836
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
I thought even the battles were pretty average.


I don’t like braveheart very much, but f*** it was a much better movie.

why would you ever want to play on a PvE server? You miss out on so much fun. Maybe it's my fps background showing through but what's the point of playing online if you're not playing against other people?


Unless you are in that first wave of people levelling though zones then the game turns into a giant gank f*** fest in the mid game. That isn’t too bad if you are always grouping, or you are one of the pvp centric classes, however for everybody else it does make it much harder to get content done and thus level to the fun content.

I would much rather wait for Battlefields and PvP with some sort of point than just random gankf***ing.
Rukh
Posts: 579
Location: Brisbane, Queensland

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applor
Posts: 2243
Location: Brisbane, Queensland

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typo
Posts: 3838
Location: Brisbane, Queensland

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typo
Posts: 3839
Location: Brisbane, Queensland

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spidz
Posts: 8159
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
and they're both gay and boring.
Loki
Posts: 5400
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
Phone Booth was done using only two cameras, for what it is, it's pretty awesome, keifer sutherlands bad-ass dude was a smart-ass and the whole idea that the movie managed to pull off something watchable where the main character/90% of the movie doesnt even move - damn good effort..
also,

QGL: Braveheart goes to QGL and get's backpunched.
ravn0s
Posts: 2351
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
wasnt phonebooth shot in like a day?
Loki
Posts: 5402
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
If it was, that's even more incredible.
For the means and how the movie was made, it's a work of art.
isaac
Posts: 607
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
It was shot in more like 11 days from memory, I watched the feature on the DVD when I hired it out... definitely not one day.
Rukh
Posts: 580
Location: Brisbane, Queensland

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AnaRoT
Posts: 8158
Location: Queensland

Even 11 days is pretty impressive.
Rukh
Posts: 581
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
Indeed it was.

p.s. I didn't mind most of the acting in Alexander...but yeah, it just dragged on too much with nothing really happening.
Obes
Posts: 1832
Location: Queensland
The worst movie ever

I wanted to walk out after about 30mins ...
- NaK0r -
Posts: 2704
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
for some strange reason i always thought it was the persians that had the war elephants...guess im wrong tho - didnt pay a whole lot of attention in history at school and i doubt civilization 2 is a completely accurate account of world history ^_^
randy
Posts: 1706
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
I didn't mind the movie but i couldn't handle the guys full on kissing eachother - i mean it's a part of history in deed but certainly one that need not be brought up in a movie =D

I think they should of picked more of a special purpose for the movie, was it to make Alexander look good or make him look bad? surely they can't have meant to make us think of him as a hero and then when he goes against the will of his men an arrogant prick? make up your mind mr director / screenwriter... =/
Khel
Posts: 9218
Location: Wynnum, Queensland
Haven't you heard? Flawed heroes are all the rage these days.
dRanged
Posts: 699
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
A mate of mine is a history buff (he graduated with History Hons) and he absolutely f***ing loved it. Personally I thought the movie assumed too much of the audience. If I knew who Alexander was, then I would have understood the background that Stone assumed we knew and thus would have known what the hell was going during the movie.

5/10 from imdb is justified. And the fight scenes were crap! What the hell was going on???
dRanged
Posts: 700
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
I didn't mind the movie but i couldn't handle the guys full on kissing eachother


Apparently the greeks were really annoyed by this; You can bet your bottom dollar if it were an American Epic of American heretage those details would be glossed over.
darkjedi
Posts: 732
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
We Were Soldiers: Braveheart goes to Vietnam


Interesting - at least this flic was more accurate to the source material than Alexander is. That said, once were soldiers was a great movie, despite some minor differences from the novel written by the real commander who was in that battle..
infiNex
Posts: 1372
Location: Brisbane, Queensland
Full Metal Jacket: Braveheart goes to wtf!

and also

It's not an acronym :P


not again fpot...
natslovR
Posts: 1033
Location: Canberra, Australian Capital Territory
I was told that the one good thing about Alexander is it makes Troy seem not so bad after all.
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